Five Ways To Make Sure No One EVER Subscribes To Your Email Newsletter

No one’s signing up for your email newsletter? Maybe you’re not doing it right. Here are the top five ways for you to beat customers over the head with your marketing message.

5. Give them a hard sell.
There’s nothing like receiving an email that screams, “BUY MY PRODUCT!” Forget about drawing them in with valuable content they will find useful and want to share.

4. Use bright colors and funky fonts
The brighter, the better. If Curiosity can’t see it from Mars, it’s not worth sending.

3. Spam your newsletter to every single person in your professional organization. (chamber of commerce, networking group, book club)
After all, you joined these groups to network, right? So that gives you permission to bombard them with your nifty newsletter about widgets. Never mind that most of them aren’t in the market for widgets. Those who are will surely love your unsolicited spam, and those who aren’t couldn’t possibly offer you anything useful, like qualified referrals.

2. Spam your newsletter to every single person… again.
They didn’t sign up the first time. Maybe they didn’t get the newsletter and would like another one? This one’s different… it says BUY MY PRODUCT NOW instead of BUY MY PRODUCT. Also, the colors are even brighter!

And the number one way to guarantee people will despise your email newsletter:

1. Subscribe people instead of inviting them.
Because everyone loves getting inundated with junk they didn’t ask for, particularly when it’s blatantly obvious you’re doing exactly what your professional organization told you not to do: mass-subscribing everyone from the Excel spreadsheet they provided. ¬†Inviting people and asking them to verify their subscription by replying to a confirmation email – waste of time! Yours, anyway.

This post is dedicated to the most recent company to add me to their list without my permission. They managed to make every single one of these mistakes, and they will never get an ounce of business from me.

If you don’t want potential customers to react the same way, have some respect for them and their inboxes. Email marketing is an exceptional way to build your business, but it can also be an exceptional way to stifle it.

Comments

  1. “4. Use bright colors and funky fonts”

    And use CAPITAL LETTERS a lot with EXCLAMATION MARKS!!!

  2. Yes, by ALL MEANS. The capital letters REALLY ADD EMPHASIS to your AWESOME MARKETING MESSAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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